Tallying All Three Marks of Existence (Anicca, Dukkha, Anatta): i found him somewhere on the (R)oyal road, n(E)xt to roko and his pet basilisk / take a crack at (M)y reutersvärd-ish heart and cure my ischemia!

Damn Clarence for showing George the truth. “This is it. I’m dyin’...” a bed-ridden Carmine wheezed from beneath his many, many sheets in his king-sized bed while a thermometer was balanced beneath his tongue. Sweatdrops drizzled down his face like condensation for a cold glass. Despite all the blankets keeping him warm, he still felt like he was encased in ice. His friend and current caretaker, Asuka, heard his exaggerated statement and answered it with a roll of her eyes as she set a bowl of soup on his bedside nightstand. “You’re not dying. You’re just sick, you goof.” She paused in her chastation to read his temperature. “...Well, your fever broke, so this can’t last much longer.” The shadow of guilt sullied her kind eyes, she opened her mouth to speak, but a sigh only came out. After letting the thought sit for a second, she tried again. “Will you be okay if I head out for a few hours? I’m supposed to meet the band tonight and... uh... Yeah, it won’t be long.” Carmine didn’t answer at first, instead he weakly rolled over and sniffed his way to the soup. Not that his nose was clear enough to even smell anything, but the heat was a welcome comfort. He stuck his tongue out as far as it would go and lapped up a morsel, kind of like a cat but not nearly as cute. “Just take the night off. My cousin's comin’ over later, so I’ll have someone with me. ‘Sides, you’ve done more than enough for me.” Asuka shuddered in response, but she tried to remain bedside-y enough that her next response didn’t sound outright harsh. “I’ll feed your cats on my way out. Just call me if you need me, okay?” “‘Kay... thanks.” There was a little glimmer of remorse yet again in her eyes as she stepped out of the room, but she said nothing further. The muffled sound of hoofsteps getting quieter and quieter signaled her departure, leaving Carmine all alone. He sniffed once and tried to have another go at the soup, but the Sandman tugged at his eyes. Then the rest of him. He felt something warm splash on his face, but when he put a hoof up to feel, it wasn’t there. Nothing was there. His hoof passed clean through. He saw it... but he didn’t feel it. In fact, the ONLY thing he saw was his hoof, the hoof he was controlling, floating freely in an empty void. No other part of him was there. Only the hoof. Then a loud light switch sounded and echoed through the void, the scene was set. A patch of grass in a forest clearing, the chirps of birds fluttered in the sound waves and brought everything to life. There was another figure, peering from the bushes. Its eyes glowed through the shadows of the brush, staring daggers into Carmine. He couldn’t quite place it but it felt judgemental. Harsh. Hateful. More eyes popped up, spattered randomly across the scene, even the parts where it didn’t make sense to place them: hovering above trees, over brush, each pair kept themselves locked to him. With each turn, the eyes followed. Trails of red followed the spinning irises, turning their past trajectory into a deep, bloody red. The forest was obscured by the red dome surrounding Carmine. A voice spoke from behind the dome. “Nothing is forever. Permanence is a lie we’ve made in order to think of us as bigger than what we are. Everything fades. Whatever faded, brings something new. An endless cycle... flowers grow from seeds, seeds that were spat out by dying flowers, only to grow into a flower itself.” Carmine knew who the voice was. The subtle hints of a Canterlot background were supported by the deep and valiant sounding voice. The red horse dare not speak his name... for he was long, long dead. The red disappeared, washed away in a large ocean wave that revealed a new scene. A coral reef, with fish swimming in a beautiful heavenscape. Bubbles floated around where a school whizzed by, but Carmine didn’t feel the need to breathe. It was as easy as if he weren’t underwater at all. Before him was a shining figure in a heavenly glow. A white pegasus, wings splayed out as he walked forward. His golden shoes clacked against the hard ocean rock. “Hello, Carmine.” With those lovely, lovely words, the PI felt himself taking shape. As quick as he blinked, his form was regained. He could see himself, but only in the pegasus’s presence. Carmine could hardly believe his eyes. There was a faint tug at his lips, they both wanted to go in separate directions. Does he smile? Frown? This apparition used his face, but... could it really be? “Val... but you’re dead.” “I still am,” he replied with a small smile. “So... this is a dream?” “It is whatever makes it easier to understand. A dream, a haunting, a revelation. It just is,” the knight answered. He gave the red stallion a gentle smile while the moving water pushed against his fire-orange hair. “Let’s talk.” ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Unbeknownst to the dozing PI, the door to his house was silently picked by a tall, shadowy figure with nimble paws that clicked away at his front doorknob. Within seconds, they were in. The door creaked. In, the Abyssynian walked, dagger delicately hidden their sleeve. Their paws muffled the steps as they snuck through the hard-wood floors and the ugly rugs. A loud yowl alerted the creature, prompting the dagger to be thrown in the direction of the noise. Thankfully, their thrown steel missed. It embedded itself within a wall and flopped comically by a pair of cats horrified cats: one fat tabby with a frozen waffle hanging from its mouth and the other, a gray and black striped kitty, merely watching with big, bug eyes. The creature hissed, "Shoo!" and the pair scrammed out the open door. The figure was able to breath a sigh of relief. At least there were no guard dogs. With quiet steps, the feline stalked up the stairs. Pictures of Carmine and his various travels dotted the hallway upwards. At the end of the hall was a door, cracked just enough that the fiend could take a simple glimpse through and see the snoozing detective. The bowl of soup had fallen to the floor, with a majority of it splashed on his face. "Gross," seethed the animal. At least he had eyes on his target. His claws extended, but their thirst for blood would have to wait for few more moments. In fact, with Carmine in the state that he is now, bloodshed may not be necessary. The Abyssynian retracted once more. Green eyes scanned for another door, right across from Gumshoe’s, closer to the stairs. The office. --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- While this was happening, the two love-canaries has reunited in a hug. A hug that seemed like it should last forever, but no amount of time would make up for what they lost. The detective couldn’t be happier... he even smelled the same. As they parted, Valor’s face grew sour. “Carmine... why do you torture yourself with me so?” Hurt marked Gumshoe’s face. The hurt was masked by feigned ignorance. “What? I don’t get what you mean.” “Yes, you do. You have friends who love you, yet you’d rather sulk about because of me. It’s been six years, Carmine. You have to let me go." The water around them drained and the landscape became dry and barren. The once freely floating fish dried into bones within a matter of seconds. Seaweed died. Coral died. Everything died around them. Carmine swallowed his anxiety at the haunting image and spoke. "I... I can't. Val, you know I can't. You were the only one who understood me--" "You talk like you ever understood yourself." "--Or cared for me--" "I was the only one you let try." "--Even though I was raised from nothin'--" "Yet you still managed to abandon everything." "--Just how the hell am I supposed to let go?" The ex-guard was quiet, but it was clear from the way his eyes danced around the dry, dry desert, he was thinking. "Tell me. What were you like before you met me?" "A fool with something to prove." "And what are you now?" Valor answered with a tilted head and a grin. Carmine blinked, clearly confused by his mannerisms. Taken aback, he simply answered, "I... I don't know." "You based your whole identity around me. But with me gone... what are you?" "I don't know." Valor continued, stepping closer. "You're doing well, aren't you? You have a house. You have friends. You can laugh, you don't drink. You don't need to keep beating yourself up. You know that, yet you're trying so hard to ignore it. I am *not* coming back. There's no miraculous survival. There's no 'start over'. I'm dead, Carmine. I'm staying dead." "I know!"-- Carmine shouted. "I've known for a long, long time that I can't keep living like this. It's lonely. It's like... It's like I can see everyone else havin' fun outside my window. I can open the window, though. I can talk to them, but I can't leave the room. But I really want to open the door. It's locked with no key." Valor smiled. "You don't have to feel bad for me. I didn't do what I had to do, I did what I wanted to. There's a difference. I made a choice and you know I haven't looked back. Just don't make the same mistake. And enjoy your life." He let a beat pass before he spoke again. The air had grown lighter... green was sprouting through the slits in the cracked earth. "That's all you needed, wasn't it? My permission?" The now embarrassed Carmine looked down while he tapped his hooves together. His mouth had formed a near pencil-thin line across his face while he wondered what to say next, but Valor was the one to speak once more. "I love you, Carmine." It was just nice to hear those three words again from his voice. Even if it was a construct, it still felt so... real. The line bent to form a smile, the bend broke when he returned the affection. "And I love you, t--" ----------------------------------------*BANG!*------------------------------- A putrid scent invaded the PI's nose, stirring him awake. Heat. Heat surrounded him. In all directions there was only heat and that disgusting smell. He coughed, hacked and gasped his way awake to get a look at the hazy room. Smoke churned from the open doorway. Lights moved, prompting shadows to dance along the floor... Fire. FIRE! With whatever strength he could borrow from the aether, the PI jumped to his hooves and crawled out of his mountain of blankets. He called for his cats, shouting their names through phlegm-filled coughs as he re-balanced himself to walk. The exit wasn't far. Just a trip down the stairs, but the damned soup bowl tripped him up and sent the poor guy tumbling down. He fell on his side... if there were any air in his lungs then he'd scream from the pain, but everything was going dark. A pony-figure loomed over him, but the face was hidden with shadow and smoke... no discernable features. As Carmine closed his eyes for, what he assumed to be, the final time, he felt the earth against his face. At first it was soft, but then it became hard. Like concrete... then grass. Sirens could be heard wailing in the distance while bright lights reflect from the far away skyscrapers. Light woke him up. Not the type one might see at the end of a tunnel, but the manufactured fluorescent of... an ambulance. Someone loomed over him once more, only they held something in their hooves. A cotton ball that was dabbed on his forehead. "You're awake," the distorted voice finally said. Carmine blinked again and refocused his energy in an attempt to look at the pony once more. Pink and yellow and... white? Blue? The colors mingled, shifting into a mod podge until they finally bordered themselves into a shape that resembled Asuka. "I left early to check on you and then I noticed the smoke and sirens. Are you alright?" she'd ask, her voice now refocused into familiarity. Carmine shifted and blinked-- as if that would somehow make everything make sense again. "Mmh...? My house, it's..." The cats. Panic filled his voice as he questioned the fate of his cats. He sat up, but only managed to mutter "Chicken And--" before Asuka reached a hoof up to shush him. "Chicken and Waffles are fine. Your cousin saw them running away from the house and got them to come to him. He called the fire department, too." Carmine let out a relieved sigh. That made him feel a little better, but... then there was the obvious question. "Uh. And my house?" Asuka remained quiet and turned her head toward the scattered dish of medical aid. "Um. It's... gonna take a while to rebuild. If they can rebuild." A beat passed. "Y'know, if you need somewhere to stay, we can make some room." If only he had heard that last part. The only sound he'd make for the time being was a little sigh while he looked out the ambulance window to see his poor, poor house, painted black by smoke and soot. The second floor was gone almost entirely, while the bottom had a large chunk burned through on the kitchen's side. Carmine couldn't hardly look at it anymore. The only thing that likely survived were a few clothes, and Valor's mementos that he stuck in his fire-proof safe. While one weight lifted, another was thrown right back on his shoulders. The fire took it all. Past cases. Pictures of his friends and family. His favorite clothes. The black and bloody scrap of fabric, torn off an Abyssinian's coat was burnt to ash as well.