cloud simply walked to the crystal empire

(warning this one just going to be a joke about the lord of the rings) cloud walked outside of his building when a few unicorn guards appear and say " you must deliver this unmarked box into the crystal empire or else we destroy everything you own". cloud grabbed the box and said " when i get back your heads are mine". the guards put a flashing collar on cloud nd said "you can not fly, use a unicorn to teleport, and we will give you a five minute head start". cloud looked at them and said "what the head start for?". the guard smile and say "before we hunt you down and capture you". cloud start running as the guard turn on a timer and say" i give him twos days before he give up". cloud started running when the guard started throwing spears at him and cloud said "great, now they use spears". the guards started charging at cloud who simply keep running. they spent about a single day running until they ended up in the frozen north. the guards stopped at a few crystal golems appear and started attacking both the guards and cloud who simply keep running. the guards defend themselves as the golems attack them meanwhile cloud made it in to the crystal empire. a guard pulled out a staff and said "YOU SHALL NOT ENTER". cloud pulled out the rift sword and said "I WILL SLAP YOU INTO NEXT WEEK". the guard started walking to cloud and said "you have no power here sucker". cloud back hoofed the guard who then ragdoll into a wall and glitch into it. cloud then throws the box into the crystal empire as it exploded into confetti as speedy claps and said "you took your sweet time almost too much but, time none the less". cloud aimed the rift sword at speedy and said "you asshole after all these years you show up?". the collar dropped from cloud neck as speedy said "one month then, we fight right here". cloud looked at speedy and said "or else what?". speedy hold a photo of cloud head on a county poster and said "this will be all over the world". cloud looked ticked off then said "deal".