There he is again. Just behind him in the mirror. Those cold, calculating eyes that probe, and prod for any signs of weakness. The constant, deadpan frown that borders on disgusted. A face that is bot... View MoreThere he is again. Just behind him in the mirror. Those cold, calculating eyes that probe, and prod for any signs of weakness. The constant, deadpan frown that borders on disgusted. A face that is both his own, and not. Not as it is now, but as it is far from now, in a different time. The Monster remains an ever present shadow that looms over Nar. It may not cloud every aspect of his life, but in the quiet moments alone like this, it’s all too comfortable with making itself known.
Nar wants nothing more than to scream at the Monster to leave him alone. To tear through the glass of his mirror, and rid himself of this visage for good. Yet, he knows to do so would be futile. The Monster may be real, but the one in the mirror isn’t. It’s only an image conjured up by his fractured mind. Deep seeded fears made manifest, forcing him to acknowledge them. Some nights, the Monster speaks to him. It calls him a failure. It rebukes his stubborn determination to maintain this life he’s built. It calls him a fool, and urges him to walk the path it did. No matter how much the Monster goads, Nar will not do as it says. For he knows to walk its path is to turn his back on all those he loves, and cherishes.
“Papa?” Cookie’s voice from the other side of the bathroom door breaks Nar’s staring match with the Monster in the mirror. “What is it, Pumpkin?” He looks over his shoulder to call back. He put Cookie to bed 2 hours ago! A hallucination maybe? Best to open the door and check.
Unease melts away as Nar feels his daughter plop herself against him in a hug. “I had a bad dream.” She states with a sniffle. Picking Cookie up to carry her in a carry hug, Nar snakes his way to Cookie’s room to comfort her, then put her back to bed. By the time he returns to his bathroom, the Monster is gone. #rp
Cookie is fairly certain her papa is planning something. He’s been pretty antsy lately. ESPECIALLY when he’s in the house! He said he was going out for breakfast with Juno this morning, but he got bac... View MoreCookie is fairly certain her papa is planning something. He’s been pretty antsy lately. ESPECIALLY when he’s in the house! He said he was going out for breakfast with Juno this morning, but he got back a lot later than he normally would! Cookie knows her papa well, and he eats very fast!
After some thought, Cookie has some ideas, but she’s fairly certain about one. He’s playing a trip to an amusement park! Then again, hems never kept that kind of thing a secret from her before. Maybe she should try to hire a private investigator to figure out what her papa is up to! If any would take her case for a few shiny bottle caps, and a handful of bits that is. #rp
After almost a year if playing Cyberpunk Red, Juno has finally convinced Nar to try the 2077 Video Game.
He was not expecting Nar to just play his RED character in the game. Much less for the pure m... View MoreAfter almost a year if playing Cyberpunk Red, Juno has finally convinced Nar to try the 2077 Video Game.
He was not expecting Nar to just play his RED character in the game. Much less for the pure melee build to actually work out for him. That changed when he saw Nar turn one man into paste by throwing another into him.
Who knew a man like Nar could take so much joy in exploding people with his bare fists? #rp
Nar has converted the empty half of his basement into a home gym (only a weight bench, and treadmill at the moment.) It seems he’s started to lift weights more often, but he won’t tell anyone why. #r... View MoreNar has converted the empty half of his basement into a home gym (only a weight bench, and treadmill at the moment.) It seems he’s started to lift weights more often, but he won’t tell anyone why. #rp
“Someone asked me what the worst part about having schizophrenia is the other day. Yeah, the hallucinations can get kinda bad sometimes, but they’re usually fine as long as I stay on top of things. It... View More“Someone asked me what the worst part about having schizophrenia is the other day. Yeah, the hallucinations can get kinda bad sometimes, but they’re usually fine as long as I stay on top of things. It’s when I open the fridge excited for leftovers, and find out I never actually had any leftovers that I hate. I wanted that leftover burrito, damn it!” #rp
This year for Father's Day, instead of going out somewhere, the Yakushi family has decided to have a little cookout. Of course, the moment the idea was brought up, Nar insisted the cookout be at his h... View MoreThis year for Father's Day, instead of going out somewhere, the Yakushi family has decided to have a little cookout. Of course, the moment the idea was brought up, Nar insisted the cookout be at his house. He's DETERMINED to earn the title of "Dad" by grilling for the cookout, and he knows his backyard grill like the back of his hand!
While the rest of the family (and Roy) sits at the tables on Nar's back patio, he, Juno, and Cookie stand by the grill as Nar prepares the food for today's lunch. Usually, Cookie wouldn't be allowed so close to the grill, as Nar wouldn't want her to get burned in case of an accident. Today, however, she has insisted on being by his side all day, and he has a hard time telling her no sometimes. Plus, she did promise to stand a little further from the grill.
"Yup." Says Juno, taking a sip of a bottle of cream soda in his hand. Nar gives one of the burger patties on the grill a flip to check the underside. Charred black. "Test patty." He states quickly. Juno doesn't buy it, but he doesn't call him out on it. "Rudo!" Nar calls, causing his service dog to come running from where he had been rolling in the grass. Nar drops the patty to the floor a few feet from the grill for the little Jack Russel to devour as Nar ensures the other patties on the grill don't burn.
As Nar finishes up his grilling, and begins preparing the burgers, and hot dogs for everyone, Cookie's little voice calls up to him. "Papa?" He spares a look downwards before returning his focus on the task at hand. "Yes pumpkin?" "Why aren't uncle Juno, and Mr. Roy spending father's day with their papas?" Beside Nar, Juno kneels down to be eye level with Cookie. He gives her a warm smile, and opts to answer the question himself so that Nar can focus on making the food. "Well Cookie, my papa is a truck driver, and he doesn't get to be home much. He couldn't be home today, and your papa didn't want me to be left out, so he invited me to celebrate with you guys." "What about Mr. Roy?" Oooooh. Yeesh. That's a bit of a rough one to answer. Juno looks up to Nar to see what he thinks.
Nar knows children aren't dumb. They pick up on things, and it's not fair to treat them any differently than an adult when it comes to most things. He'll tell Cookie the truth, but he's definitely going to omit a few details. "Well pumpkin, Roy's parents... They disowned him. Meaning they told him he isn't their son anymore. Mr. Roy... He did something bad a long time ago, and his parents didn't like it." The specifics of which Nar was not going to get into. For starters, it's not appropriate for a child, and second, it's Roy's personal business. It's not Nar's place to be telling people about it. Cookie seems to contemplate for a moment. Her gaze shifts over to Roy, then back to her father. "Did he say sorry?" At this, Nar nods. "Many times. He's very sorry, and he's done a lot to show it." The fact that Asuka was comfortable with him even being in her vicinity was proof of that.
The air of seriousness is cut by the sound of a familiar song starting up over the radio Nar has playing outside.
At first, Asuka didn't really notice that California Mares was playing on the radio. It mostly blended into the background underneath the conversation she and her mother were having. She did notice it when Nar, and Juno suddenly burst out in dance. Watching the two dancing, you'd think they were professional backup dancers. It's like they've been practicing the choreography their entire lives. Beside them, Cookie is just trying her best to copy them.
Suddenly, Asuka has forgotten how hungry she is, because she's busy busting her gut at the table. #rp
After much internal debate, Nar has finally pulled the trigger on the one purchase he never thought he'd make. At least, not until he was significantly older. Now, instead of being used for storage, N... View MoreAfter much internal debate, Nar has finally pulled the trigger on the one purchase he never thought he'd make. At least, not until he was significantly older. Now, instead of being used for storage, Nar's garage is being used for what it's meant for. A car.
Thanks to some advice from his uncle Steve, Nar managed to get himself a nice family car for a good deal. It took him playing hardball with the salesman at the dealership for like, 3 hours, but he got the retail price instead of the jacked up price they usually use. The salesman's manager isn't going to be happy, but that's not Nar's problem. Could he have paid the jacked up price? Oh yeah. Drop in the bucket for a multi-millionare rockstar. However, the salesman was being way too sleazy. Nar wasn't going to give this guy the satisfaction of winning.
Either way, the purchase is done, and now, Nar, Juno, and Roy are sitting on chairs in Nar's lawn as they drink cola, eat chips, and admire Nar's new car. #rp
Sometimes Nar forgets the background music that plays in his living room isn't a hallucination. Everyone else who enters the living room hears it too. He still has no idea where it comes from, or why ... View MoreSometimes Nar forgets the background music that plays in his living room isn't a hallucination. Everyone else who enters the living room hears it too. He still has no idea where it comes from, or why it plays. He's thought about contacting a wizard to look into it, but it's always unobtrusive, and adds a nice ambience to his house. So, he's decided to hold off for now. #rp
Ever since the party Friday, Nar hasn't been able to look at himself in the mirror. Every time he sees his own face, he sees a monster staring back at him. Friday night, he snapped, and genuinely trie... View MoreEver since the party Friday, Nar hasn't been able to look at himself in the mirror. Every time he sees his own face, he sees a monster staring back at him. Friday night, he snapped, and genuinely tried to kill his own sister. Asuka, and the rest of his family have tried to console him, tell him it wasn't his fault. In a way, it wasn't. After all, the bloodwork the hospital decided to do on a hunch when he was brought in was pretty damning.
The hospital found traces of a popular (and VERY illegal) hallucinogen in his system. The Psychiatrist at the hospital believes the hallucinations it caused interacted with his schizophrenia, causing him to believe the hallucination he saw was real. Given that Asuka was with Nar the whole night, and other partygoers confirm they never saw Nar partake in anything like that, it's believed that he was drugged. How someone managed to do it without him noticing, or why they did it in the first place aren't known right now. The police have gotten involved, and they're taking this pretty seriously.
Still. That doesn't change the fact that Nar could have genuinely hurt, or killed his sister. What would happen if he snapped again in his own home? Are Cookie, and Autumn safe living with him? Maybe they should be living somewhere else, just in case. Gah! This whole situation is starting to really get to his head! Better talk to his therapist sooner, rather than later. He might be able to help Nar process this complex jumble of thoughts, and emotions he's having right now.
At the very least, everyone is okay physically. Though Nar can't say for sure if Asuka is okay mentally after what happened. She came over to visit the other day, but she made sure Hiari, and Juno were there with her. The words she spoke to him were soft, and re-assuring, but the look in her eyes was not. She was scared. Like she didn't know if she could trust him anymore. Rightfully so. Her big bother, the man who has always loved, supported, and protected her, tried to kill her. Even if he wasn't in his right mind at the time, it doesn't change the fact that she had to look her brother in the eyes, and know he wanted her dead.
Damn it Nar! Stop thinking about it for now! You're just getting into your own head! You're gonna make things worse! You can talk about this with your therapist later. Right now, you just need to focus on staying calm, and managing your schizophrenia. Maybe a nice movie on the couch could help. He has been meaning to show Cookie the old movies he used to watch as a kid. #rp
Autumn had spent the better part of the last few weeks learning to sing. She'd never viewed herself as a good singer to begin with, but with the help of Cara she'd gained some footing in the field. Bu... View MoreAutumn had spent the better part of the last few weeks learning to sing. She'd never viewed herself as a good singer to begin with, but with the help of Cara she'd gained some footing in the field. But that wasn't her only desire. She wanted to get better at writing the lyrics to a song. Maybe not the instruments, Caramella took care of that whole mess. With the help Cara, her friends, and a few pointers from Nar Yakushi, Autumn finally had a song sketched out. She waited for the next chance while Attack on Mango was together to offer up the song for them. Even singing them a very nervous rendition of it.
It was obvious the reason she wrote it, and who it was for.
I don't listen to the radio
All those stories had to let them go
I'm tired of words that I already know
The same old Juliet and Romeo
And every love song out of history
They were so beautiful, sung so perfectly
But love is never perfect
Nothing good is perfect
I don't believe in love when it's an archetype
Give me something no one else could ever write
I don't believe in love when its a paradigm
Leaving mythology and finding paradise
I don't believe in love out of a different time
If it is tried and true it's only pantomime
Let's break away from everything we recognize
Leaving mythology and finding paradise
I don't watch the movies on TV
Searching for a hero I could be
I'm not looking for an odyssey
On a quest for my Penelope
And every love song that I've ever heard
They're too elegant, too self assured
Cause love is never perfect
Nothing good is perfect
I don't believe in love when it's an archetype
Give me something no one else could ever write
I don't believe in love when its a paradigm
Leaving mythology and finding paradise
I don't believe in love the way we fantasize
Perfectly happy, picturesque and sterilized
Let's fly away from all the dreams we idolize
Leaving mythology and finding paradise
And finding paradise
Tearing away the pages
Chasing away the ages
Let's break away these cages
And we can erase these faces
And you can write me your heart
And you can write me your heart
And you can write me your heart
And you can write me your heart
[Song by Metajoker with 4everfreebrony]
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